Connect Instead of Correct Challenge EBook

We can connect instead of correct.

I have taken the Connect Instead of Correct Challenge Workshop Series and turned it into a book. Why?! Because I basically explain how to connect instead of correct in most of the common scenarios that parents ask about.

Some topics covered

- Bedtime

- Getting ready in the morning

- Out in public (public dysregulation, material wants, impatience, incentives vs. rewards)

- Mealtimes

- Messes

- Aggression

- “Rude” behaviour

- Safety concerns

And so much more… I also explain the “why” behind all this, including a lot of links to research and additional resources to support your learning. Even if you aren’t ready for the challenge, the book will help you understand this approach in a way I just can’t teach via social media posts.

Take the Connect Instead of Correct Challenge!

4 weeks to a more connected relationship with your child

Week 1: Try not to correct for a week

Week 2: Replace correction with connection

Week 3: Reflect on the times your were able to be more connected.

Week 4: “Yes Day” (child-led, yes day) and reflection.

This EBook has a variety of articles and reflections to help support your learning, as well as the content from the workshop series.

Excerpt:

When we first think about trying to avoid correction, this can seem really scary because we're not sure what that's going to look like, how it's going to feel, but I also think there is this deep fear of failing. We think “will it be so hard that I can't do it, or I find it so frustrating that I will want to giveup?” Let me alleviate you of that fear because you can't fail this challenge. But let's talk a little more about our fears around this challenge.

What are we afraid of?

·      House will be chaos

·      Won't be able to maintain our routine

·      Children will refuse to do anything necessary

·      Children may get hurt

·      Might be extremely stressful for the parent

What are we afraid of? Let's talk about it.

I think these are pretty common fears, in relation to this challenge. I want to assure you that all of these things will not be any harder than they already are. This challenge is also not about total chaos.

We're just learning to re- frame our expectations and the way we communicate them. Also, there is no wrongness in RP, and this goes for the parents too. You will likely have many moments where you revert to correction. That's ok, in fact it's more than ok, it's part of the process.

If you feel your child is in danger or you're going to be late for work and you can't quite figureout how to avoid correction, in the moment, I am giving you permission to go ahead and correct. It will not impede on the efficacy of the challenge. In fact, it may give you something really interesting to explore, later, when you have a minute.

You will likely also have moments where you correct, and don't realize it until later, and that's ok too. A few weeks ago, you may not have even noticed yourself correcting, it may have become second nature, especially if you were often corrected. Every time you correct, don't look at it as a failure, but a chance to learn more about yourself and your child.